On International Issues

A few years back, around 2006 I believe, I was working in Nepal.  I had been enjoying, at least for a short time, the peace brought about by the monarchy’s temporary control of state.  After a while, I began to dislike the misuse of the power to get government employees to line up to greet the king when he was back from an international visit etc, but I appreciated the initial decrease in political tension the coup had brought about.

As a Nepali, what I cared about for was the welfare of my country, not about the support of this ideology or that (though to be frank, my cultural upbringing does make me somewhat biased towards the advantages of a monarchy).  Anyone who could keep the seat of the power and keep their heads at the same time, and also drive the nation towards a better situation, was all I wanted to see, it’s still probably the most important thing I would like to see in the context of the political situation in Nepal.

That was my perspective.  There was another very important perspective, even from my self-centered outlook.  It was the international perspective.  The king taking over was a very bad thing, it was a statement against democracy, against the freedom of the people to choose their own fate.  It was a regression into things from earlier, more primitive times.

I disagreed with that perspective fundamentally, not because I supported the king, but because from my perspective, things cannot be generalized.  I believe all systems have their strong points and weaknesses, and the most important thing is the ability of whoever implements the system, as well as their sincerity.  That is a different story, a different post (one made long ago in my old blog and already gone with it).

Today, I am in a different place, for the time being.  I only hear about Nepal from phone conversations back home, from facebook, and once in a while, from news sites.  And today, I wonder, what is the international perspective on the dividing of the country up based on ethnicity?  Why is it that I hear less of an official outcry from other governments, is it just because I have paid less attention, or is it because the division is being done in a way that seems democratic enough?  Perhaps I have just not paid enough attention to the news, and there is a bigger outcry than I have heard so far.. I will have to dig through the news a bit now.   As of now, this is the most ‘international’ opinion I have found: http://www.ccd.org.np/new/resources/report.pdf

Sincerity

You are my friend,
or so you say,
and so,
I believed.
Give and take,
lies and sincerity,
given, and expected,
as the situation would demand,
and advantage,
Oh, advantage,
lies over sincerity,
indignance over humility,
and the satisfaction of
“I win “,
a bewildered soul am I,
oh world,
confused by your friendship,
for I try too sincerely.

A State of Mind

Ever since I was small, I have had a fascination for our sanskrit cultural heritage.  Hinduism has a rich literature of Sanskrit stories, and among these, the Mahabharat was one story that had captured my interest, as I had heard that it held mystical secrets if understood deeply enough.  I believe I read one out of the six volumes of the Mahabharat when I was in college, though the experience had been much more of a challenge than I had expected.

I had read the hindi translations, trying to make sense of the Sanskrit prose above the translated lines, and that was a big challenge in itself.  The bigger challenge perhaps, linked with the gradual realization that the Mahabharat I had seen in T.V. was probably much easier to follow than the unabridged form .

However, it was also a fun experience.  I was reminded more than once of the Arabian nights– one story leading to the narration of another to illustrate a subtle point, and that story itself narrating quite a few more within itself, and on and on… surprising me once too often when the related story ended, and the narration jumped back to the story from where it had been recited.

At least, that’s how I recall it, vague as my memories are about reading it… I find myself wondering that I actually read such a thick volume, but I’m pretty sure I did…. and then, after reading just one volume, life happened, and I got a bit busy, ever after, so far at least.

While reading the volume, I did find some concepts that I found very surprising back then, which I have probably not heard of quoted quite as such anywhere else, and that I find very interesting to think about now.

One of these concepts is about your state of mind.  Having a sorrowful state of mind, in my vague recollection, was likened to being in a sinful state (I would appreciate authoritative confirmation/denial of this if anyone happens to know).

Once in a while, quite frequently nowadays, when I find myself in a state of depression, of resignation, ever once so often, I remind myself that I am in a ‘sinful’ state, my sin being that I can and will gather myself together to make myself feel better, and ready to act.  I may feel sad, I may feel scared, I may feel alone, I may feel angry, but I will gather all my strength together to make myself ready to go on, to acknowledge who I am, my dreams, my identity, my desire to follow my heart, and to keep my mind in this state, despite the extra effort it takes, whenever I can, for this is a state of mind from which I can follow a path I can look forward to.

Yesterday

The sun was a beautiful, blazing orange, and half the sky seemed dyed in its brilliant, deep color.

The beauty of a day gone by, at its very end, and all that I saw, even that, by sheer luck, was the setting sun.

The sun had set a million times before this, just as beautifully, if not more, and perhaps, every minute of the day, it set somewhere with as much magnificence, while simultaneously rising somewhere else with just as much.

But for me, it was a day of realization, albeit temporary.  Each of my days was filled with the same magic, but I was too caught up in the small stuff to remember the rest of the world, most of the time.  I could see the day slipping through my fingers, beautifully, with a gentle reminder, “I am your yesterday now, but there are as many magnificent days in your future, if you just open your eyes and your heart”.

Yesterday.  A flaky, one-shot attempt at capturing its beauty in electronic words… just for the heck of it!

Perspectives

Ever been in a situation where you know what is going to happen, and tried to tell a majority who believes otherwise?  Later, as they realize the situation, you could probably say “I told you it would happen”, and they would probably already have forgotten you ever said.  A pseudo-poem dedicated to expressing that situation.

Perspectives

The truth before my eyes

you shall perhaps one day see,

someday,

but today,

I am the fool

for seeing

what you do not,

as you

have company,

while I

stand alone.

Thought

Thought

I could probably write

a hundred lines

without much thought.

Do you think

those lines

would then be meaningless?

A poem

A poem
is a hard thing to write
when your mind
is not in the right places,
a hard thing to understand
when your mind is not in the right places,
and a hard thing to see,
when you have not visited the right places
online.
Sometimes,
you run into one of those
who act like a poem,
talk like a poem,
but leave you wondering,
whether they really are poems,
or just a sham.
Sometimes, it's just your lucky day  .

Just randomly friends, just randomly regrets

Friendship is such an important word in life.  so is the word regret, among many other words.
Yet, as my mind suddenly recalled how I met one of my old friends, I was somewhat amused.  The friendship itself has faded a long time back, a yellow page in the book of life, but the memory was quite vivid.  And it was random, if anything in life is random, and not fate.  The details of the meeting itself are unnecessary.

After that flashback on a start of a friendship, I had another, somewhat more controlled, flashback, on some regrets in my life.  Things that I did not know of, then learned of and did not pay attention to when I had the chance, eventually, let slip away, then finally, realized that I perhaps wanted them after all.  Regrets in my life, perhaps all summed up by the last line.  However, that unexpected encounter with something that I ignore and eventually realize I probably want…. that too, when I recall specific incidents, seems like a lot of coincidence.
So at least of the two important things in my mental life are the products of chance.
This brings me to the question: what would have happened if those events didn’t happen… if the chance encounters did not occur?
Here is what I think:
If those chance encounters had not happened, some others would have.  And there would have been other friendships, and other regrets, most likely similar in outcome to whatever state they are in currently in my life (ref. the story I frequently cite about two families in a village who wanted to migrate to a different village, but for different reasons).
So no matter who and what I had bumped into, no matter what chances I had gotten, I would probably be in roughly the same state in life today, at least mentally (feel free to challenge this assumption.. it is sort of hypothetical after all ).
Not only that, chance being what it is..,. similar random occurrences for friendship and regret will always come up in life, as long as I live, with a bit of adjustment of the condition I am in physically and mentally.
The only common variable in all this randomness being, who I am.
So that makes me wonder about the reality of regrets, and the fading away of old friendships: my life will be at least approximately as it has been so far, which makes me wonder how real the fetters of fear of leaving my comfort zone really are, in so many different ways: what do I stand to lose, if I, the only common variable in my life from at least one perspective, am always there, fully present?
– Just some more random musings .

A Hypothetical (and Strange) Assumption, and a Weird (Kind of) Conclusion

Lets assume that whatever you wished for, you would get someday, somehow, whether you wanted it or not at that point in time (e.g. I want a 100 bucks right now, but get it when whatever I needed it for is already gone).

If that assumption were true, chasing your dreams would make a lot of sense– you chase them and fight for them, and get them while you still want them, rather than have them forced down your throat someday.

If that assumption is false, I think it’s still worth chasing after them…. they make life more fun (and challenging), and give you an excuse to face your faults and make yourself better. 

– semi-metaphysical musings on a random weekend

Proud to be great

I’ve often wondered about the collapse of great empires in history, of civilizations that reached a peak, then eventually declined.  I still like my ‘time’ theory of things– when it’s your time, you just get lucky– to a great extent, I believe this explains things overall, if you are willing to hold such a mindset.
However, today, a thought occurred to me.  The thought being that not only civilizations, but people, and hence, all entities deriving from them, have stages where things are at risk of going wrong, where you could steer completely out of track and risk getting lost.  When you are struggling to get better, when you have a goal in mind, as long as you don’t believe in your own infallibility, you are, to the best of your own ability, able to detect when things are going wrong, and to steer yourself in the right direction again, with some struggle of course, but that’s what you know is the price of greatness.
As you stay successful for  a longer period of time, you perhaps forget how it is not to be so. Success becomes your birthright, in your own mind.  You forget the effort you spent on getting there, and you underestimate the need to stay alert and to fix things if you go off track.  You might even notice problems, but the effort you need to spend may seem too menial, too much beneath you.  And then, gradually, your success, your empire, crumbles.

The root of this observation being: one of the primary downfalls of a civilization (and people) is perhaps false pride.  Do you agree?